Darkness on my lips
by ZimLover05
Summary: YESS! NEW CHAPS TO ASENT!! *winks* you know you want them ... >> note : the first few are very angst , get your'e tissues ;_; )) I love you all , thanks for reviewing !! >>Zimlover _05
1. Default Chapter

Authors Notes   
  
Invader Zim is not mine , my good sweet god i wish it was , but that flawless honor is Jhonen Vasquez's .   
  
( WE LOVE YOUUUU !!! ^^ )  
  
ZimLover / Horuka , a.ka. me , Blackwing , Raenaffel , Ivy and so forth are copyrighted by me --   
Dont use them in other fanfics , unless one , you ask me , and i say yes , and two , they are at least somewhat tastefully used , please ! _   
  
Aqua Marine ( my best buddy ) owns Cassidy , Terra and Orion , ( Our baby boy at the moment )   
( thankies to you for writing this with me -- its soo much funnn !^^ )  
  
As a last note , this is a followup to " Asent " . Read and review both please ! ILOVE REVIEWS !!!   
  
AND IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO TRANSLATE THE RPG SCRIPT FOR YOU !!! -   
  
--- So no flames .. those hurt and are completly unneeded -- have some consideration please .   
  
  
With love ,   
  
: ZimLover_05  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
  
  
-- For our two favorite boys in the whole world , Zim and Dib ,   
  
and for my " Maid Of Honor " , Aqua , who made me want to become an author .   
  
I love you all soo much !!   
  
=^ ^=  
  
**************************************************************************************  
  
  
Chapter Three  
" Exile "   
  
  
  
" Longing haunts the sprirt day and night ,   
  
Bitter and sweet , tormenting the weary heart . "   
  
" Between doubt and fear , between a blink and a tear , it will linger . "  
  
" ...............Rest and fear taking flight . "   
  
  
  
  
  
  
Red , my sire .   
  
...I killed him to save her .   
  
The ultimate crime for an Irkan to commit .  
  
..Yet i didn't hesitate .   
  
Zim had been thinking about the past for a few nights .. he found it within himself to mourn it , because somehow , he knew it would never be the same again .   
  
The tallest , knew what it was to be changed ; as he had reminded himself before ,   
even Purple had known an outsider's kiss , and been transformed by it .   
  
He had once upon a time been an innocent .  
  
.....Someone like her .   
  
.....no .   
  
  
No one was like Horuka .   
  
  
  
  
  
" She was my first love ,   
my angel ..."   
  
" She never thought wrong of my head , hand or heart . "   
  
" Im not saying it was an easy thing -- she had a warrior's spirit , thats for sure --   
but Love was never an easy thing for me . "   
  
".... I guess Red wanted it this way --  
  
That if i ever came close , that my soul was ever still ..  
  
..i'd lose it ....  
  
...become alone again .....  
  
....Dark , like him . "  
  
  
" No love , no peace , just me and my demons .. "   
  
  
  
" ......Six Months and a Universe away , and i still became my father . "  
  
  
  
  
  
And thats what it all boiled down to ;   
  
his grief had a name .   
  
...Horuka .   
  
  
His instinct tempted him , mercessly .   
  
Earth , he had corrupted ,   
  
...Raenaffel , he had failed .   
  
  
  
.....She , had gone .  
  
Horuka , who's trust was as shattered as her heart ....  
....who ran from the one she used to run to .   
  
" Oh , beloved ...."   
  
  
Every image he'd recalled , reliving them like the day was then , related to his bride to be .   
  
He had fallen in love with her , when she saved his life ...  
  
He remebered her shadow falling over him in the noon sun , her arms wide , her eyes shining -- selfless .   
  
She stepped in front of the tallest and offered her death in place of his own .   
  
" I wont let you ! " she had pressed .   
  
The pain washed over him as easilly as the stinging rain that fell would .   
  
  
But for her he would swim the seas ,   
come back fried -- die .  
  
...ZimLover ...  
  
Lastly, he remembered their day,   
  
their only day--  
when he finally realized it all ,   
  
..what hurt worst of all .   
  
  
  
Illinois , 2001   
  
ZimLover had awoken from an uneasy sleep that day , and when he saw her face , he knew something had to be wrong -- after a half hour of waiting out front , she emerged , shouldering her bag , distraught as she passed him .   
  
Zim asked aqua what was wrong , but she would not explain -- it seemed too harsh for her to speak , and he gave in -- drawing back into the lab .   
  
She had sat on the steps , deep in thought and tears -- this was no ordinary dream to her -- the death Irkans played games with her thought -- they drank her fears like wine , and her feelings for him had not given ease to her heart with this , if anything , hurt her more .   
  
She walked to his door , knocking the frame , lightly .   
  
Hearing the framilar noise of fist on his door , he turned from the chip work , and opened his door a crack .   
  
Glancing up at his tan love , he opened it all the way .   
  
" What is wrong ? " he asked her .   
  
" You'll never bielive me , she said .   
  
"But how will you know if you dont tell me ? "   
  
She gave in . " I'll tell you , just -- she bit her lip .   
  
" Its that bad ? he asked .   
  
" Yes , she confessed ,   
but just -- stay with me ...."   
  
He lead her in , and she took a deep breath as she sat on the lab table beside him .  
  
" .....They sent me another vision last night ...."   
  
" ....it wasn't the same .."   
  
" what was it ? He questioned , as a look of fear crossed her face .   
  
" It's horrid ....you --  
  
you........ "  
  
" ...I what ? "   
  
  
" K-killed ...  
  
--me . "   
  
  
His eyes immeadatly turned wide .   
  
" WHAT??   
  
I KILLED YOU ?!! "  
  
She shivered , almost tasting the blood that poured from her lips that night .   
  
"...yes ....   
  
...i even felt the knife . "   
  
  
Zim jumped off the table at once .   
  
" B-B-B-But how can that be possible ?! "   
  
" Why would i kill YOU ??! "   
  
She started crying , a fury burning in her words .   
  
" They dont want us here -- like this "   
  
She kicked the chair , her eyes narrowing .  
  
" You BASTARDS ! She cried ,   
  
"Why wont you let us be !? "   
  
ZIM stepped beside her .   
  
" AH ! CALM DOWN ! "  
  
She fell on her knees ,the tears glistening on her tan skin .   
  
" ...the wost part of it was ...   
  
...you liked it ... "   
  
Zim bent down on his knees too , trying to give her solace , he lifted her chin with her fingers , the tears gliding slowly .   
  
" None of that it is true and you know that , he spoke ,   
i wouldn't hurt you and like it . "   
  
She leaned on his shoulder , feeling him breath , trying to calm herself   
  
" I-it was so real ..thats why i didnt dare comfront you .."   
  
She opened her book , where she wrote it down , earlier on , and he read it -- his face falling to shock .   
  
She looked away , wiping a few of the tears from her eyes , trying to catch her choked up breath .   
  
He dropped the book and placed his arms around her .   
  
" Im sorry for getting you caught up in this ....."   
  
She leaned her head on his chest .   
" No , im sorry -- this is my fault , she cried .   
you are stronger than i . "  
  
"....I -im afraid , zim . "   
  
  
" No , he said , looking into her eyes .   
  
" I am the weak one . "   
  
" ....I mean , taking over a planet to prove myself , when i made a fool of myself at the start ?.... "   
  
".....That was weak -- your'e the strong one .. and you still are . "   
  
She looked up at him   
  
" Even if that is true , zim , what if they trap your'e thought -- like dib's were -- what then?...."  
  
He tried to speak , but even his words were uncertain   
  
" ..I dont know what to say about that , i -- "   
  
"You dont have to , she said . "   
  
Her eyes were true and honest .   
  
" Just tell me something , zim .."   
  
" ...what's that ? "   
  
"... Do you love me ?...." she asked , her voice trembling .   
  
  
" ...Yes . I love you . "  
  
And when he replied , her eyes brightened in wonder , even though the tears were still there .  
He loved Horuka . He knew what it was she had wanted to hear for such a long time , but never dared to ;  
And yet there was a hope with his own words as he held her in his arms , but then ...  
  
" ...I love you too, Zim . "   
  
She loved him . And now , knowing that , he had so much less to lose .   
  
" ..And if you do , she spoke , than thats all I'll ever need to know . "   
  
And Right there , and then , they kissed .  
  
His heart pounded along with hers , holding the knowledge that the kiss was the beginning of something much bigger ; this was a seal , a promise , and a first step .   
  
When they stopped , she looked into his crimson eyes , deeply , and she whispered ;   
" I -i never thought -- "   
  
He brushed her cheek with the palm of his hand , so gentilly .   
  
" I'd never hurt you ...."   
  
  
  
  
Zim shivered as he looked out on the town , his words ringing false in his mind .  
  
" how could i let this happen ....oh , Horuka , where are you ? "   
  
  
But zim wasn't aware that on another rooftop , he was being watched .   
  
Her name was Aqua ,  
and what she saw was awespiring in this troubled plane of exsistance .   
  
--An Invader with a soul .   
  
As far as she knew ,   
Blackwing was the only one of thr brainwashed population to recover Humanity -- his free will .  
  
In Aqua 's mind that made him an intensely tragic figure .   
  
Also , brave .   
  
But a victim .   
  
But also , a victor .   
  
A boy with a burden .   
  
..And a purpose .   
  
A boy who , when he looked out over the city , must surely had to muse about how he lived ,   
how he would die , and how , with his soul torn , he would keep it up .   
  
"I can walk like a human ,   
but i am not . " he had once told her .   
  
But she looked into his own eyes , as truthful as ever and said ,   
" It doesn't matter my friend . "   
  
So what am i ? His mind concurred , snapping him back to the present .   
  
" What am i ....?"   
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
end of chapter three   



	2. "Human Behavior"

Authors Notes   
  
Invader Zim is not mine , my good sweet god i wish it was , but that flawless honor is Jhonen Vasquez's .   
  
( WE LOVE YOUUUU !!! ^^ )  
  
ZimLover / Horuka , a.ka. me , Blackwing , Raenaffel , Ivy and so forth are copyrighted by me --   
Dont use them in other fanfics , unless one , you ask me , and i say yes , and two , they are at least somewhat tastefully used , please ! _   
  
Aqua Marine ( my best buddy ) owns Cassidy , Terra and Orion , ( Our baby boy at the moment )   
( thankies to you for writing this with me -- its soo much funnn !^^ )  
  
As a last note , this is a followup to " Asent " . Read and review both please ! ILOVE REVIEWS !!!   
  
AND IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO TRANSLATE THE RPG SCRIPT FOR YOU !!! -   
  
--- So no flames .. those hurt and are completly unneeded -- have some consideration please .   
  
  
With love ,   
  
: ZimLover_05  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
  
  
-- For our two favorite boys in the whole world , Zim and Dib ,   
  
and for my " Maid Of Honor " , Aqua , who made me want to become an author .   
  
I love you all soo much !!   
  
=^ ^=  
  
**************************************************************************************  
  
Chapter three "Human Behavior "   
  
  
  
  
The late hours belonged to those who never heard a wake up call ;  
  
Insomniacs ,   
  
Runaways ,   
  
...then there was us .  
  
  
Another night .   
Another thousand memories .   
  
Emphrean . Its a city like no other .   
  
The moon shone over the rubble glass skycrapers , an errie blue ..a matrix for everyone who lived or would live from now on .   
  
As the darkness grew , Emphrean began its waking dreams .   
  
Little children in the workshops would dream of thier parents comming back for them , as they promised . .   
  
It sometimes happened -- but as far as we know , they never were alive , when they did .   
  
Emphrean was a city more obsessed with fate than any other in the world ever was .  
  
That was the thrill and the curse .   
  
There was no way to control it .  
No way to court it .   
No way to avoid it .  
  
That was why Emphean was hard .   
  
It ground up the weary , the unlucky , the lovers , and wiped them out .   
  
  
  
  
Dib walked past the dank , hallow rooms , keeping to himself like he always did ...like everyone else .   
  
He turned up a smaller hallway .   
  
  
This place he knew well ,  
for it was Zim who once dwelt here .   
  
  
  
The place was beat up from time's cruel hands , and always seemed darker than any of the other parts of the domes were --if that were possible .   
  
The living chambers were below , the beddings above , and the soft talk of unusual ,   
off and on world langagues echoed though the walls , so easilly .   
  
Zimlover stood in the center of the shaded window ,   
glancing toward the city like she often did , searching for a way out .   
  
  
In the dying sun , the cietal gleamed on the horizon like diamond .   
  
.....It never did seem real to her , this new world , a repository of greed and dibasment .   
  
Dib didn't speak ,   
he could only watch his friend with the taughtest pain inside of him .   
  
  
  
She was dark , the charcoal dressings rivialed by only the dead ,   
broken technology that lye at her ankles .   
  
  
......She had no idea what she had gotten herself into .   
  
  
She had fallen in love with a dictator ....   
  
She had spent four years of her life treading on quicksand ,and there was no turning back now .   
  
  
ZimLover could see him in the far corner of her vision .   
  
His profile was forever etched in her mind .   
  
Dib was one of the few people that you'd never forget in a millon years ,   
like you'd see for two seconds , but remember every detail forever -- He was mysterious .   
  
His Sable hair , the way he carried himself ....  
  
-- like a fighter who knew he could take on anyone , yet so very wary at the same time .   
  
He stood in the doorway , his pale blue eyes lifted , echoing the smudged sunset .   
  
"..... What happened ? " he asked .   
  
  
ZimLover felt the cold cut of weakness against her cheeks , and without turning , spoke ,   
  
" ...He asked me --"   
  
Dib's jaw dropped .   
  
" He ASKED you ?! "   
  
She nodded , the tears welling in her eyes .   
  
  
" W-what did you say ?? Dib stuttered , almost as stunned as angry .   
  
" NO , DIB ! " She cried , whirling around to him , hurt and a mixed anger in her eyes .   
  
  
"... I told him no for YOU ! "   
  
  
" ..I let go of the one thing that was actully keeping me still in this cage of yours .. "   
  
  
"...........Alex , i ....."   
  
Dib paced to her lightly , trying to comfort her , but she pushed herself out of his arms .  
  
  
" Please Dib ...... she whispered ,   
  
  
......... just leave me ... "   
  
  
It may have been only for a moment , but the cold he could feel in her , like ice , in her touch....  
..in her heart ...there was nothing he could do then ..   
  
  
".... But --"   
  
...He stopped himself -- pushing it wasn't going to get him anywhere .   
  
  
And slowly , he closed the door behind himself -- ZimLover , crying softly into her folded arms.   
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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